Chapter 108

All the videos have ended.

I stared at the dense list of files on the screen, my finger hovering over the mouse, hesitant to click on any of them. For a moment, I didn’t know what I should do.

My neck stiffened as I turned to look out the window, where the thick darkness swallowed the last glimmer of light.

It’s really dark now.

“Bang!” The sound of the computer lid slamming shut was like someone kicking me, jolting me awake from my numb state.

Hospital! Yes… hospital…

I practically jumped out of my chair and rushed out the door, hurrying to the hospital to take the elevator directly to the top-floor VIP ward area. The corridor was eerily quiet. I strode towards the ward and abruptly pushed open the half-closed door—inside, there was only a young nurse in a pink uniform, making the bed and changing the sheets.

“Hello? May I ask who you are?” the nurse asked me politely.

“Where is the young man who lives here?” I asked, my breathing quickening.

“He was discharged this evening,” the nurse explained, then turned away to continue packing. My heart sank, and a wave of intense regret washed over me. I hated myself for not pulling myself out of the video sooner.

The elevator descended, and a brief feeling of weightlessness washed over me. As soon as I stepped through the glass doors of the lobby, the cool night air rushed in, dispelling some of my drowsiness. Just then, a familiar figure emerged from the doorway almost simultaneously with me. She had her head slightly bowed, seemingly lost in thought. “Zhao Qingjun?” I called out instinctively, even surprising myself. What was she doing here? At the hospital at this hour?

“Ah!” She was startled by the sudden sound, and the small white plastic bag in her hand shook violently. When she looked up and saw it was me, she hurriedly covered the plastic bag with her hand, a look of panic flashing across her face.

“What are you doing here?” I took a few steps closer to her and continued to press, my gaze falling on the bag she was trying to hide. “Uh… I… nothing!” she stammered, her eyes darting around, while simultaneously trying to hide the bag behind her back.

“Are you sick? Why are you here?” I asked as I walked toward her.

“N-nothing…it’s nothing.” She continued to avoid me.

“Let me see!” I walked up to her, my tone a little stiff. Because of work, I’ve had more and more contact with her over the past six months, and our relationship has become increasingly familiar. The feeling she gives me is different from Jingyan’s fiery and direct attachment; it’s more like a gentle breeze that can quietly soothe my restlessness, a rare source of warmth and relaxation in these chaotic days.

Perhaps because I had just watched those videos, I cherished this feeling of warmth all the more. Seeing her come out of the hospital with her medicine, I was genuinely worried about her.

“It’s nothing!” To my surprise, she turned away from my outstretched hand, which made me even more puzzled.

“What happened?” I grabbed her arm and snatched the white plastic bag she had hidden behind her back.

“Oh dear…” Zhao Qingjun pouted, her face full of sorrow, but she did not fight fiercely any longer.

I frowned, opened the bag, and took out the medicine bottle inside—sertraline.

“Isn’t this… antidepressant medication?!” My eyes widened, and I quickly looked up at her, my voice filled with worry: “Zhao Qingjun! What… what exactly happened? When did you start taking this kind of medication?” Zhao Qingjun lowered her head, her hands unconsciously twisting together, her voice low and wavering: “Actually… I’ve had problems for a while, but I’ve been taking other medications on and off, and they weren’t very effective. My emotions haven’t been very stable… so I could only… come to this private hospital to get medication.” I looked at this senior girl who always brought me sunshine, completely unexpected that she was bearing such pressure alone. “Get in the car first, I’ll take you home. This isn’t the place to talk.” I started the car and drove away from the hospital. The atmosphere in the car was a bit heavy. I first took out my phone and sent a message to my mother: “Mom, what are you busy with?” My mother replied quickly, her words concise: “In the dormitory.” Because Zhao Qingjun was sitting next to me, I didn’t want to video call my mother directly, but unexpectedly, my mother took the initiative to send a short video. When I clicked on it, the picture showed my mother’s small kitchen in her dormitory. She was wearing an apron and slowly stirring a small pot with a spoon, as if she was cooking porridge. But the one speaking was not my mother—it was Jingyan’s lively voice coming from off-camera: “Xuanyu~ Since you’re not here, I can only enjoy this nourishing porridge with Mom~” Jingyan’s tone was full of smugness, deliberately showing off to me and being close to my mother.

Hearing Jingyan’s familiar, boisterous voice and seeing my mother’s seemingly normal figure, my tense nerves relaxed considerably. At least my mother wasn’t alone. I checked the time; it was a little past nine, almost my mother’s usual rest time. I smiled and jokingly replied with a voice message: “Okay, then you can sleep with Mom tonight, so she won’t be scared alone.” Then I hung up the phone.

If all else fails, I’ll call my mom separately around 11 PM to check on things. Right now, it’s more important to settle Zhao Qingjun, who’s clearly feeling down.

Zhao Qingjun kept her head down, her fingers fidgeting with the seatbelt, remaining silent. I guessed she must have a lot on her mind.

As the car passed a 24-hour supermarket, Zhao Qingjun suddenly said softly, “Xuanyu, can we stop for a moment? I… I want to buy something to eat.” Only then did I realize that I hadn’t eaten or drunk anything since the afternoon because I was watching videos, and my stomach was terribly empty.

“Okay, I’m hungry too, let’s go together.” I turned the car into the supermarket parking lot.

The supermarket was brightly lit, but not crowded. She walked slowly ahead, absentmindedly browsing the snacks and prepared foods on the shelves, while I followed behind pushing the shopping cart. Apart from the occasional question like, “Want some?” or “Want some milk?”, we barely exchanged any words.

A strange sense of unease lingered around me, not because of the silence between me and Zhao Qingjun, but because I felt… there was some other reason. Every now and then, I would subconsciously glance at the end of the shelves or the empty aisle behind me, but I found nothing.

Everything was normal, but this overly normal quiet was what made it seem strange.

Back at Zhao Qingjun’s rented apartment, which was also my former home, I found it still clean and tidy. However, as soon as I entered, I was hit by a stuffy, hot atmosphere. It seemed that she lived quite frugally and couldn’t even bear to turn on the air conditioner.

Zhao Qingjun silently placed the plastic bag containing cooked food and stir-fried vegetables on the table. Only then did I notice that the few lilies in the vase in the center of the table had completely wilted. The once pure white and pink petals were now curled and yellowed at the edges, drooping listlessly, exuding an aura of decay that overlapped with the haggard and dejected Zhao Qingjun before me. “Sit down! Eat! I bought some cold dishes, eat them while they’re hot,” she said weakly, pulling out a chair and sitting down first, her eyes staring blankly at the table.

I ignored her lame joke about “eating cold dishes while they’re hot” and sat down opposite her. My mind raced: Jingyan was with my mother, so she should be alright for now; Zhao Chenyu had run away after being discharged, but I could always find him. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my turbulent emotions, and decided to prioritize dealing with my “good friend’s” unusual condition.

“Qingjun?” I leaned forward slightly, helping her take the lunchbox out of the plastic bag, and asked in a soft voice, “What… what’s wrong? What happened? Tell me.” “Nothing…” But she suddenly stood up and left her seat. Her attitude was as if I had done something to wrong her.

“I haven’t been at the company for a while, has something happened?” I’ve been frequently traveling on business with my bald senior colleague for the past month or two.

My gaze followed her back as she came out of the kitchen again, carrying several cans of chilled beer in her arms.

Tsk, what’s going on here?

“Bang!” She slammed a can of beer onto the table, making the dishes rattle softly.

“Bang!” She haphazardly smashed all the beer bottles on the table, picked one up, let it suffocate, and then pushed it in front of me.

“Will you have a drink with me?” Her tone was strange, a mixture of unyielding firmness and pleading softness. “Sure!” The aroma of wheat juice wafted from the can, the damp scent clinging to certain dark emotions within me, roughly dragging them to my face, intertwining them with the reality before me.

“You haven’t answered my question yet.” I took a sip of the cold drink and continued to press.

“Let’s drink and chat!” Zhao Qingjun held up her can at me. I shook my head, suppressed my impatience, picked up my own can, and gently bumped it against hers.

“Click!” The sound of soda cans colliding was like a rusty old lock being suddenly turned open.

“Xuanyu~” Zhao Qingjun tilted her head back and took a big gulp of wine. Some of the wine spilled down her chin and into the round neck of her T-shirt. She didn’t care and just wiped it off casually with the back of her hand.

“I think… I’ll have to leave here.” I had just struggled to pry open the plastic packaging of the disposable chopsticks with the tip when her words struck me like a thunderbolt, freezing me in place, almost causing me to drop the chopsticks. “What?” “I said—” She tilted her head back and took another gulp, swallowing loudly. The alcohol quickly flushed her fair cheeks, but the desolation in her eyes became even clearer. “I’m leaving T City.” She repeated it, her tone certain, and a sense of loss I had never seen before rose on her gentle face.

“What exactly happened?” “You drink first!” she interrupted me, pointing at my wine jug and ordering. “Glug—” I had no choice but to tilt my head back and gulp down a large mouthful. The icy liquid slid down my throat, but it couldn’t quell the anxiety in my heart. “What happened? Can you tell me now?” “Eat! Eat!” But she didn’t answer. Instead, she picked up her chopsticks, grabbed a piece of food, and tried to stuff it into my mouth, trying to shut me up with food.

“Hey, wait a minute, don’t stuff it in!” “Glug—crunch!” She tilted her head back and drank the entire can of beer in a few gulps. She then forcefully crushed the empty can, making a piercing crunch. The aluminum can instantly turned into a twisted “bottle strip,” which she then casually slammed onto the ground with a “thud.”

Then another bottle.

“Xuanyu! Am I really that bad?” Zhao Qingjun’s voice trembled slightly due to alcohol and her emotions.

“I don’t think so.” Her question made me seem to understand something, but the alcohol made my thoughts unclear.

“Why—gulp!” She took another big gulp, as if she needed alcohol to embolden herself to say the rest of the sentence. “Why? I’ve worked so hard! Before, I was occasionally late for work because I lived far away, but since I moved here, I’ve never been late! I spend most of my lunch break reviewing documents and handling work. When I leave work, I’m almost always the last one to go. They all laugh at me, calling me the ‘lights-out angel’! I do all the tasks assigned to me the most seriously, I’ve never slowed down the project progress, and I’ve optimized them very well—why!” “Thump! Thump!” She became more and more agitated as she spoke, slamming her fist hard on the table. The disposable chopsticks I had placed on the lunchbox were shaken off by the sudden “earthquake” and rolled onto the table. The food in the lunchbox also shook, and some sauce splashed out.

“My efficiency and output are clearly better than some of the regular employees! But now that the project is in its later stages, they tell me… tell me I’ve been ‘optimized’… Why… why is this happening…” Zhao Qingjun’s voice grew softer and softer as she spoke, her emotions rapidly shifting from agitated accusations to helpless sorrow. In the end, she could no longer hold back, burying her face deeply in her arms, her shoulders beginning to tremble slightly.

“I see…it’s because of layoffs…” I nodded silently.

“These bastards, they even said I didn’t have enough education, what a load of rubbish!” She buried her face in her arms, her voice muffled. “Why didn’t they say I didn’t have enough education from the beginning! It’s because… Waaah.” Large tears rolled down Zhao Qingjun’s cheeks. “Waaah… It’s because they treated me like a donkey, grinding the beans and then not wanting to feed me grass… Waaah.” Zhao Qingjun trembled uncontrollably.

Seeing Zhao Qingjun sobbing, my heart clenched painfully. A strong urge made me want to hug her, but my legs seemed to have a different personality, stiffly fixed in place, unable to move.

“Qingjun,” I called softly. She slowly raised her head, her delicate face already covered with streaks of tears, her eyes red and swollen, and the tip of her nose red as well. She looked disheveled and pitiful.

I continued, “Do you still want to stay with the company? If you do, it’s just a matter of saying the word.” However, after hearing my words, Zhao Qingjun shook her head without the slightest hesitation.

“Fine, let them fire me then, just make sure they give me the full compensation. I don’t know what I’ll face if I go back in. Besides, I don’t have any happy memories at this company except for you.” Zhao Qingjun said dejectedly, her fingers unconsciously rubbing the edge of the beer can, the cold metal seemingly offering her a little comfort.

Zhao Qingjun’s words were like a needle, piercing the soft, wounded part of my heart.

“It’s ridiculous,” Zhao Qingjun said, her tear-streaked face twisting into a self-deprecating smile that was even more unsightly than crying. “I worked part-time while studying, risking my life to finish this master’s degree. Then I gritted my teeth and paid so much money to attend training courses. I finally managed to find this job… only to find out that it’s completely useless!”

“You say ‘optimize,’ and you just ‘optimize’ like that…” She took another swig of wine, the alcohol completely opening her up and stripping away her last armor.

“I’ve been working for over six months, scrimping and saving, and finally managed to save a little bit of money… and it’s all gone to this damn depression…” Her voice was filled with helplessness. “I haven’t dared to send money home for two whole months… I told them I moved to a place with more expensive rent, because I was afraid they would ask, afraid they would worry… Now, my income has completely dried up. If it weren’t for… if it weren’t for you who let me stay here, and have this little home… I might have already… already been homeless, or gone back to my hometown…” She paused, her gaze drifting to the dark night sky outside the window, as if looking at a distant dream: “I really… I just want to rely on myself… to put down roots in this big city, so that my parents back home can have peace of mind, so they don’t have to work so hard anymore… I want to make their lives better through my own efforts… but… sob…” She couldn’t continue, or rather, everything she wanted to say, everything she could say, had already been said in this desperate accusation.

She covered her face with her arms again and burst into tears, her sobs filled with the ashes of shattered ideals.

As I listened to her words, I felt a deep sadness, as if something was gripping my heart tightly, making it hard to breathe.

To be honest, I don’t really understand her resentment and grievances. The reason I’m sad is that I’ve known her for so long, yet I didn’t notice the mental problems she was experiencing.

Perhaps this strong girl has always been deliberately showing me her best side.

I opened my mouth, only to find that any words were utterly powerless at that moment. I truly didn’t know how to comfort her; all the “it will be alright” and “don’t be sad” seemed ridiculously weak in the face of the cruel reality she was facing. I could only silently pick up the can of liquor, take another big gulp, and let the cold, bitter liquid wash over my equally chaotic heart.

Watching her intense sobs gradually turn into intermittent sobs, I cautiously asked the practical question: “So… what do you plan to do?” “Ugh… um!” She swallowed hard, as if swallowing all her tears and grievances, her voice hoarse and strained: “I’ll go back to my hometown. I probably won’t come back.” For some reason, hearing her say “never come back” made my heart clench, and a strange sense of loss and emptiness quickly spread through me. “Meeting you at the hospital, I don’t know… is it the last bit of fate God has given me?” Zhao Qingjun’s tear-streaked face forced a fragile, relieved smile at me. “Even if we hadn’t met at the hospital, I had already decided that before I left, I would definitely find you… like this, have a proper meal, and say goodbye.” She paused, tears welling up in her eyes again, her voice as soft as a feather, yet it struck my heart heavily: “Xuanyu, you are the only warmth I have here.” Zhao Qingjun’s words were like an electric current that instantly shot through my body, making me tremble violently, my eyes suddenly burning and stinging, and my vision quickly blurring.

I was her only source of warmth, but wasn’t she also the sanctuary in my heart during those chaotic, repressive days filled with betrayal and confusion? Otherwise, besides her striking resemblance to my mother, why would I pay so much attention to her?

Mom…my mother was also defiled.

A bittersweet sense of relief welled up inside me. I looked at her and couldn’t help but smile. I looked up, about to say something, when I saw a wine jar being held up in front of me again.

Zhao Qingjun’s eyes shone even brighter with tears, flashing with determination and madness: “Xuanyu! Don’t think so much! Tonight, just the two of us, let’s have a good drink! Let’s drown our sorrows in alcohol!” Looking into her gleaming eyes, the light within them stirred the same impulse within me. I nodded heavily, said nothing, picked up my own wine jug, and forcefully went to meet her.

“Click!” The sound of soda cans colliding was like a brand new golden lock finally being turned open.

“Drink!” “Drink!” We seemed to be competing, or perhaps encouraging each other, tilting our heads back and gulping down the liquor. The icy liquid, bitter and bubbly, burned our throats and washed away our reason.

“Xuanyu~” I don’t know how much I drank, all I know is that I casually shoved the wine bottles on the table and they clattered and rolled to the ground with a loud noise.

Zhao Qingjun’s voice became sticky: “You, so handsome, so capable, and from such a good family~ You’re definitely not like—hiccup~ unlike me, with so many troubles.” “Hehe~hiccup—troubles~ my troubles, uh~ my troubles, I can’t even talk about them, hiccup! Talk!” My head was throbbing, so I slumped onto the table, my forehead pressed against the cold surface. Countless women’s faces and figures flashed uncontrollably through my mind. Aunt Ouyang’s charm, Jingyan’s infatuation, Mu Qianning’s noisiness, Mu Lingze’s liveliness, Lin Xuanman’s rebellion, and my mother… my mother’s gentle appearance… These faces spun and appeared in my chaotic mind like a revolving lantern, but soon they were all submerged in the yellow liquid with various ambiguous smiles.

The yellow liquid flowed extremely fast, roaring, but it looked unusually viscous, like wine, yet not like wine… more like an inescapable swamp…

“What’s bothering you~” Zhao Qingjun’s voice seemed to drift from afar, broken and intermittent, “A blind date? You…you have a girlfriend, don’t you? Hiccup! Or hiccup! My childhood sweetheart.” She was so drunk that she couldn’t even speak clearly, and her words were slurred.

I struggled to concentrate, barely managing to hear her words. I wanted to argue, to scream, to say that it wasn’t all the trouble, to recount the tangled relationships and betrayals… but all I managed was to laboriously lift my arm, which felt like it weighed a ton, and weakly wave it in what I couldn’t even tell was her direction. Then, like a puppet with its strings cut, my arm slammed heavily onto the greasy table with a “thud,” not caring whether it would get covered in leftover food. “Stop talking, please stop talking…” I mumbled incoherently, feeling the world spinning around me. But this utter dizziness and loss of control strangely gave rise to a distorted fascination, as if only in this way could I temporarily escape the truths gnawing at my heart.

“What do you mean, ‘stop talking’?! I’ll talk! I’ll talk! I’ll talk!” Zhao Qingjun was like a firecracker that had been lit, her hands clenched into fists, her voice trembling with sobs as she pounded the table, making the empty wine can rattle softly. “Talk! Talk nonsense! What about you! How come you’re still single?” I, too, was stirred up by a bit of my drunken arrogance, and I abruptly raised my head to retort to Zhao Qingjun, struggling to open my heavy eyelids and staring intently at her. I discovered that she had suddenly multiplied into three overlapping phantoms, like a shadow clone, with a relatively solid shadow shifting back and forth among them, eventually managing to squeeze back into one, but this one figure also began to sway uncontrollably from side to side, before splitting again…

“I…I am Shan Sen! I need to make money! What kind of man am I messing with!” Zhao Qingjun shouted drunkenly, her neck stiff.

“Huh? So you’re still… a virgin! A virgin! Haha!” I pointed at her, laughing so hard I almost fell over.

“Yes! A virgin! So what?” Instead of being embarrassed or angry, she seemed to have found something to be proud of, and puffed out her chest. “Never slept with a man! Haha!” “What are you laughing at! You dare to break up with me?” Zhao Qingjun suddenly stood up, leaning her body towards me, but swaying violently.

“Tch! Bedroom!” “Fine, I’ll just stay here!” A series of chattering sounds rang out, and in my blurry vision, Zhao Qingjun, dragging several afterimages, swayed and stumbled to her feet. She almost collapsed after taking just one step, quickly reaching out to grab the table to steady herself, and then, like a runaway boat, she wobbled and crashed into me.

“Come on! Young man, smash it!” She grabbed my arm, leaning most of her weight on me, reeking of alcohol. “Let your senior sister see your airplane~” she said, gesturing with her hand in the air.

Amidst the lingering aroma of alcohol, a delicate fragrance entered my nostrils, like a spark that instantly ignited the restless blood coursing through my veins.

“Let’s go!” I grabbed her hand, and I don’t know who was pulling whom. The two of us stumbled and tumbled away from the dining table like conjoined twins, moving towards the bedroom.

“Thump!” A dull thud followed by a soft cry of pain.

I felt as if I had fallen heavily into a fragrant, soft cloud.

“Mmm~ Ugh!” Suddenly, something wet, soft, warm, and smelling of alcohol and sweetness clumsily and eagerly shoved into my mouth, silencing all my breath and thoughts. Damn it! What on earth is shoving into my mouth!

I was annoyed by this sudden “attack,” and almost instinctively, I stuck out my tongue, trying to drive away this uninvited “invader” while launching a more ferocious counterattack. At the same time, my hands were frantically tearing at my clothes; it didn’t feel like I was taking them off, but more like I was struggling to break free of heavy shackles.

“Hmm~ you naughty junior!” “You naughty senior! I’ll strip you naked!” “Ah! That’s all!” “Is there anything else? These tattered clothes… how come there are so many…” “That’s all! Just these few pieces—wait, wait a minute…” She suddenly seemed to have discovered something, her voice filled with drunken surprise, “You… you have… there’s a big black worm between your thighs! Wait, wait a minute! I’ll kill it!” As she spoke, one hand actually trembled as it reached down.

“It’s not a bug…it’s a dick…” “It is a bug~ a scary big~ bug~ haha~” “No~” “It is~” “I’ll let you try and you’ll see!” All patience and reason were burned away, leaving only the most primal instincts and impulses. In a daze, I felt the soft, warm jade beneath me begin to writhe restlessly. I held my hard, lust-filled penis and, relying on my vague instincts, groggily pressed it against a moist and slightly trembling entrance.

The moment I touched her, all the struggles and writhing beneath me suddenly seemed to be paused.

“Didn’t you want to see an airplane? The airplane’s coming right now! It’s taking off right now!” With a drunken declaration, I suddenly strained my waist and lowered myself down!

“Ah—” A scream filled with immense pain pierced the fog in my ears, making me feel a strange irritation and… a sharp, clear-headed pain.

“So warm!” What followed was an indescribable feeling of being enveloped and warmed! The sudden pleasure made my whole body tingle and go weak, almost instantly surrendering me. But after a brief adjustment, the stimulated desires only intensified, craving even more frenzied exploration.

“Slap slap slap!” I lost all ability to think, and my mind was no longer focused on anything. My body was completely driven by the most primal animal instincts, and I was thrusting my hips.

The cries of pain in my ears disappeared… then they started again… intermittently… with sobs…

I closed my eyes.

They completely gave up thinking.

All I know is that I’m shrugging my hips.

I am impacting.

I am entering a warm body.

I’m having sex.

Am I really having sex?

With whom?

Why?

The waves of alcohol and desire completely engulfed me.

After a series of uncontrollable aches and numbness in my lower back and convulsions throughout my body, I collapsed like a mountain drained of all its strength, lying completely sprawled on the soft surface beneath me.

…

…

…

Damn, my head hurts so much, my temples are throbbing. Where am I?

I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelids felt so heavy, like they were welded together. Why couldn’t I open them?

The bed I’m on… feels a bit unfamiliar. It’s quite comfortable, but a little hard. It doesn’t seem like my bed.

A sharp pain shot through me. Enduring the intense headache and dizziness, I mustered all my strength to pry my eyes open a crack. A ray of morning sunlight streamed in unceremoniously, forcing me to immediately close them again. But the darkness had been torn away; my vision was initially blurry, as if through frosted glass, before gradually refocusing and becoming clear.

The first thing that caught my eye was a large, messy expanse of long, black hair, like inky seaweed, supporting a striking patch of white. That white gradually coalesced into the outline of a face… familiar yet strange… Was it Mom? No, no… This thought jolted my swollen brain like a needle! It wasn’t Jingyan either—I sat bolt upright!

The movement was too fast, and a sudden, intense dizziness and headache made my vision go black, and I almost fell back down.

A rumpled thin blanket stretched from my side to the other. Beneath the blanket, two slightly curved, smooth legs were outlined, along with a round, firm, white bottom. Above the blanket, snow-white breasts were partially concealed, their pink nipples half-hidden. Above that, a graceful neck, a delicate chin, and a sleepy, pretty face—and a pair of clear eyes quietly watching me.

“You’re awake?” Zhao Qingjun asked softly, her tone not showing much of the confusion of someone just waking up, but rather an unusual calmness.

“You…you were awake a long time ago?” I stammered, my heart pounding. My gaze swept frantically over her naked body, then I looked down at myself—also completely naked!

I immediately glanced under the bed and saw that our clothes, from underwear to T-shirts, were scattered haphazardly on the floor, tangled together.

A pair of purple lace panties was inexplicably draped over a pair of glasses frames in the distance; no one knows how they got there last night…

Everything is self-evident.

“Hmm… I was awake for a while, but… my body was so sore, so I went back to sleep~” I don’t know if it was because she was tired, but her voice was not as cheerful and optimistic as before. It became unusually soft and gentle, even… a bit like… my mother.

“Qingjun~ I—” I was about to say something when a sharp, throbbing pain struck my temples. It was probably because I had jumped up too hard, and the aftereffects of the alcohol were kicking in.

“I know what you’re going to say,” she gently interrupted me, her gaze calm as she looked at my face, a gentle sadness in her eyes. “It’s alright, Xuanyu. We drank together, we got drunk together… and—” she said, reaching out her hand, her warm fingers gently grasping my forearm, which was resting on the bed. “This… is perhaps for the best. Consider it… the last gift I’ll leave you before I go, Xuanyu~” Her touch was light, yet it felt like an electric current, sending a shiver down my spine.

“I’m so lucky to have met you, to be able to…like you~” Her hands were both cold and warm…

“Zhao Qingjun,” I took a deep breath, suppressing my turbulent emotions, and looked at her earnestly, “Actually, you can stay here. Work is really as simple as a word to me; I can arrange everything for you, you don’t need to…” “No,” she interrupted me softly again before I could finish, shaking her head and offering a faint, bitter smile, “Although I don’t remember much about yesterday… and it hurt a lot… I don’t want what happened last night to become an exchange. I hope it… is just a confused… beautiful memory. Is that okay?” I lowered my head and fell silent. I truly didn’t intend to use it as a bargaining chip, and she understood my feelings; I genuinely wanted to help her, and she knew I was sincere.

However, matters of the heart are like an unfinished building that will never be completed. You can’t bear to demolish it and rebuild it, but if you want to resolve it, you face countless tangled entanglements and concerns.

Silently, I lifted the thin blanket that still connected us with the warmth of our bodies. On the light purple sheets, a dried, dark brown, irregular bloodstain stared into my eyes, silently warning me—I had cheated on her.

This time it’s a real affair.

A major reason I had a relationship with Aunt Ouyang before was that the idea of ​​winning her back took precedence. The guilt I felt in that confusion seemed to be diluted by many things, but now…

I covered my face with my hands, my fingers digging deep into my hair, my mind a mess, trying to figure out how to deal with this situation, how to face Jingyan… I didn’t notice the faint rustling sounds coming from beside me.

Until the sound stopped, my back was suddenly enveloped by a warm and soft sensation.

Zhao Qingjun hugged me from behind, her cheek resting gently on my shoulder, her soft, full breasts pressed tightly against my back, without any provocative friction, just quietly pressed together.

“I’m sorry, Xuanyu, I made you do something wrong. It’s okay if you hate me.” “It’s not your fault…” I lowered my hand, looked at the blinding sunlight outside the window, and said this softly. The huge weight in my heart was still pressing down, mainly thinking about how to face Jingyan.

“I’ll go get something to eat first,” she said gently, her voice regaining a little strength. “Then I’ll tidy up the bed.” As she spoke, she awkwardly moved off the bed, her bare feet touching the floor, and began to bend down to look for her underwear, which she had somehow tossed aside.

Just as I took a deep breath, trying to calm my turbulent emotions—”creak!” The sound of the old security door being pushed open clearly pierced through the living room and into my ears.

“Is this the place? Pfft… Ah! Such a strong smell of alcohol~” A sweet voice that I knew all too well came from the doorway, which struck me like a thunderbolt, and my blood seemed to freeze!

How could this be! That’s Jingyan’s voice!

Zhao Qingjun and I, who were sitting by the bed, suddenly looked at each other, our eyes filled with shock and panic, as if we had seen a ghost in broad daylight!

Am I dreaming?!

In a fit of extreme panic, I tumbled off the bed, ignoring my headache, and frantically picked up my underwear from the mess on the floor, hurriedly pulling it on—even in a dream, I couldn’t face this naked. “It’s here, I haven’t been here in years.” Another mature woman’s voice, tinged with a touch of melancholy, followed. This voice made my legs, still clutching my underwear, buckle, and I almost collapsed. It was Aunt Ouyang’s voice! How did they both find their way here?!

Before I could think further, before I could make any futile efforts to “destroy evidence,” clear footsteps echoed through the living room without pause and stopped at the bedroom door. Two familiar figures appeared in the backlighting at the doorway—yes, it was my mother-in-law, Ouyang Lan, and my girlfriend, Qin Jingyan.

“Ah!” Zhao Qingjun, who had just hurriedly put on her underwear, was startled by the sudden intrusion and screamed. She instinctively stepped back and fell against the stage with a thud. Her shocked and helpless gaze swept frantically between me and the two women at the door, and her face turned deathly pale.

I slumped back onto the messy edge of the bed, staring blankly at the door, my mind completely blank, utterly clueless about what emotions I should be feeling at that moment.

When Aunt Ouyang and Jingyan at the door saw the scene inside the bedroom, they both covered their mouths at the same time, their pupils contracting violently.

Aunt Ouyang’s eyes instantly turned icy cold. Without looking at me, she locked onto Zhao Qingjun. In addition to obvious anger and hatred, there was also a hint of shock and complexity hidden in her eyes.

Jingyan, on the other hand, seemed to deliberately avoid Zhao Qingjun, staring directly at me. In just a second, her initial shock quickly transformed into immense pain and hurt, her lips trembling slightly. But soon, the pain was replaced by an unusual calm and… relief? I opened my mouth, my throat so dry I couldn’t make a sound, but I didn’t know what to say, or rather, my mind went blank.

What more needs to be said? The disheveled and wrinkled sheets, the glaring dark red bloodstains, the men’s and women’s clothing scattered all over the floor, and the two people on the bed and under the bed wearing only underwear—nothing needs to be explained.

The air fell into an unspeakable silence. The summer morning sunlight shone through the window, bright and warm, but the bedroom felt like an icebox.

“Tap—” In the dead silence, Aunt Ouyang’s high-heeled feet took a light step into the bedroom, the sound of the heels hitting the floor amplified infinitely, becoming frighteningly clear.

“Mom~” Aunt Ouyang had just taken a step inside when Jingyan grabbed her arm.

“Let’s go,” Jingyan said abruptly.

“Jingyan, you…” Aunt Ouyang was taken aback by her daughter’s reaction and was momentarily stunned, looking at her in surprise. “Jingyan…” I stood up and called softly.

“Let’s go first, Mom.” Jingyan didn’t look at me, nor did she show any extra emotion. She just pulled Aunt Ouyang’s arm even harder, her tone firm and even urgent. She half-forced Aunt Ouyang, who was still in shock and anger, to turn around quickly and walk towards the door.

Just as my heart was pounding and I was about to ignore everything and chase after her to stop her, a figure rushed out of the bedroom door even faster than me.

“Wait! Auntie and… Qin Jingyan…” Zhao Qingjun’s voice was still trembling, but her words were very clear. Her words successfully made Aunt Ouyang and Jingyan stop in their tracks, but they did not turn around, leaving only their cold backs. “Last night it was me who dragged Xuanyu to drink. It was my fault, I drank too much… that’s why… that’s why this happened. All the responsibility is mine, please… don’t blame him.” Zhao Qingjun’s words made my tense heart suddenly relax, but then it churned even more chaotically.

Jingyan still didn’t turn around, her back stiff. Aunt Ouyang turned her head, her eyes full of warning and hatred glaring at Zhao Qingjun. Zhao Qingjun’s face was pale, but she did not flinch.

“I vaguely remember that Xuanyu was very sad when we were drinking last night. He had something on his mind!” Zhao Qingjun’s words made the other three people in the room—me, Jingyan who was standing with her back to the door, and Aunt Ouyang—shrink almost imperceptibly at the same time.

Then she whispered, “And me… I became somewhat lucid when I was in pain. Xuan Yu… when he was ‘sleeping,’ he shed tears and kept calling out Jing Yan’s name.” After she finished speaking, I saw Jing Yan’s back and began to tremble slightly uncontrollably.

“You can punish me however you want, but Xuan Yu’s pain is real. I know I have no right or status to say such things, but I still hope that you… can… help him…” Zhao Qingjun became more and more dejected as she spoke.

“Aunt Ouyang, Jingyan, I—” I seized the opportunity and hurriedly tried to speak, wanting to say something.

But Jingyan, who was only trembling, became like a frightened cat when she heard my voice. She hurriedly grabbed Aunt Ouyang and left quickly.

I instinctively took two steps to run after him, but then I suddenly realized that I was only wearing my underwear. How could I possibly catch up in such a disheveled state, and how could I explain it? I could only anxiously and angrily retreat back to the bedroom and frantically search for and put on my clothes.

Zhao Qingjun was still standing blankly at the bedroom door, head down, staring at the empty living room, looking somewhat powerless and dazed. I quickly threw on a T-shirt and pants, and stumbled after her in my shoes. Just as I rushed out of the rented room and into the dimly lit hallway, the faint sounds of suppressed crying and conversation coming from downstairs made me stop abruptly.

Is that Aunt Ouyang and Jingyan? I subconsciously slowed my pace, even held my breath, and carefully moved down the stairs, peering through the gaps in the handrail.

At the entrance to the building, the morning sunlight slanted in, outlining two familiar figures. Jingyan was leaning against a dirty wall plastered with various small advertisements, her shoulders trembling slightly, her hands covering her face, and intermittent, suppressed sobs could be heard. Aunt Ouyang held her tightly, gently patting her back with one hand, her eyes full of heartache and helplessness.

“Girl, don’t cry.” It was Aunt Ouyang, who hugged Jingyan with a face full of heartache.

My heart clenched painfully, and the invisible hand gripped my chest even tighter. “Girl, Mom will stand up for you, let’s not cry anymore,” Aunt Ouyang said again.

“No! Mom!” Upon hearing this, Jingyan suddenly raised her head, ignoring her tears, and blurted out.

“What?” Aunt Ouyang was speechless for a moment.

“I believe in Xuanyu!” Jingyan’s words were like a warm current rushing into my cold chest, but they also brought an even stronger sense of guilt, making me feel ashamed.

Aunt Ouyang was also taken aback.

“Those bottles…you saw them too. I believe he didn’t do it willingly,” Jingyan added, sobbing. “As for that girl, she’s right, after all, I also…” At this point, even Aunt Ouyang’s eyes darkened, and she silently lowered her head, letting out a soft sigh. My heart was in turmoil; anger, guilt, sorrow, and helplessness tangled together, as if trying to tear me apart and then knead me back into a ball. “Sigh…if this continues, the two of you…” Aunt Ouyang sighed.

“It’s okay, Mom. I won’t separate from Xuanyu. I told you before that I would forgive him no matter what he does.” Hearing Jingyan’s humble and gentle declaration, I gripped the stairwell railing tightly. The remaining debris was stuck in my palm, and the slight friction brought a piercing pain.

“You silly girl~ What am I supposed to do?” Aunt Ouyang’s voice choked with emotion.

“And Mom, that text message was so strange.” Jingyan blinked her tear-filled eyes, a shrewd glint in them.

A text message? Could it be that someone told Jingyan that Zhao Qingjun and I are here?

A name flashed through my mind instantly: Zhao Chenyu. It could only be him.

“It’s not just the text messages that are strange,” Aunt Ouyang said, curling her lip with disgust and incomprehension. “That girl too—tsk!” She seemed to want to comment on Zhao Qingjun, but couldn’t find the right words.

“What’s wrong, Mom?” Aunt Ouyang hesitated for a moment, looked at her daughter, and finally lowered her voice to say, “That girl…”

I always felt… that her appearance and temperament… were so similar to yours… when Aunt Liu was young. Especially those eyes and that spirit…” She said this with a complicated tone, and even gave a bitter smile afterward, a smile that carried a hint of self-mockery and an indescribable feeling.

Not only was Jingyan stunned, but even I, hiding on the stairs, felt a sudden jolt. Was this what my mother looked like before I was born…?

The two people downstairs fell into a brief silence because of this discovery. Just as I took a deep breath, mustered up my courage, and was about to go downstairs to talk to them face to face no matter what, a loud, booming voice suddenly rang out, “Oh dear, did you smash your baby? Did you cry? What’s going on?” It was so penetrating that it seemed to travel directly from the first floor to the fifth-floor rooftop.

“Oh, no, it’s nothing!” Jingyan was startled by the sudden loud voice and hurriedly turned to the side, frantically wiping away the tears on her face.

“It’s alright, sister. Your child just had a little trouble at work,” Aunt Ouyang said, offering timely assistance.

“Oh my! I was so scared when I walked in and saw this young lady crying. You must work nearby and rent a place here, right? Look at you two, dressed like young ladies and big bosses. Let me tell you, sweetheart, I work for the neighborhood committee. If you need anything in this area, just tell me, don’t be shy! Here’s my phone number—” “Ah, sister, no need, we’ll leave now…” Aunt Ouyang thought this older woman was just being polite, but she hadn’t expected to encounter a “truly helpful citizen.” Seeing that staying any longer would lead to being bothered or even surrounded, she quickly waved her hands and declined, “Ah, no need, no need, really no need, sister, thank you! Thank you so much! We’ll leave now, we’ll leave now…” As she spoke, she quickly pulled up the still somewhat dazed Jingyan and fled from the building entrance, disappearing from my sight.

The unexpected incident completely shattered my desire to chase after her and explain. I stood frozen in place, sighing helplessly. Forget it, if I chased after her now and she saw me and started bothering me, and if things escalated, given the incredible information-spreading abilities of the older folks in this old neighborhood, by the afternoon, all sorts of rumors would probably be circulating throughout the entire community… In that case, Zhao Qingjun probably wouldn’t be able to continue living here peacefully. Dragging my heavy steps, I returned to my rented room.